OWL CITY ROCKED.

20 truths about me

1. I’m left handed, but I find it easier to cut things using my right. I also throw balls better with my right hand.
2. I am an INTJ.
3. The first rock concert I ever went to was Linkin Park. However, we were insanely far from the stage and the acoustics were really bad in the stadium, so we could barely understand what Chester Bennington or Mike Shinoda were singing/rapping.
4. My favourite author of all time is Rosemary Sutcliff.
5. I listen to a lot of singer-songwriter stuff. My favourites are Alexi Murdoch, Sufjan Stevens, Regina Spektor and Brooke Fraser.
6. But I am also mostly an alt-chick. Think Coldplay, Snow Patrol, The Panics…
7. When I was little, I convinced myself that I had an older brother.
8. I am a non-denominational Christian. My maternal grandfather was a Presbyterian pastor, my paternal grandparents are Catholic. I attended an Anglican kindergarten and Methodist and Anglican schools. My church in Singapore is non-denominational while my church here is multidenominational.
9. My favourite Christian literature book is Blue Like Jazz. I have a crush on Don Miller’s humour.
10. Sometimes I crush on the strangest things… like people’s brains.
11. The three languages I want to learn are Hebrew, German and Welsh.
12. My studying philosophy is Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. STUDY HARD AND BE EVIL.
13. Although I tend to cry quite a bit during movies and songs and whatnot, the one song that always never fails to get me is When You Believe from The Prince of Egypt. It’s the children’s choir at the end… *sniff*
14. I’ve moved three times since I came to Shanghai to three locations that are within a 15 minute walk of each other.
15. The one woman I really admire is Queen Elizabeth II’s mother, Elizabeth Bowes-Lyon. I’d love to be called “the most dangerous woman in Europe” by Adolf Hitler.
16. When I’m really, really bored, I like converting Word documents to PDF files.
17. I’m left-brained.
18. I’m not a clumsy person, but I tend to trip over wires. If my death ever involves wires, it won’t be because I was electrocuted, but because I tripped over them. Aiii…
19. About 95% of the people I know don’t really get my sense of humour. The 5% that do are amazing. I love them. *hugs*
20. I cannot describe how much I dislike side-hugs. They’re not really hugs; they’re only half a hug. It doesn’t feel like the giver is really putting the love into them. Give me a proper hug, you tall people!! If you want I’ll get onto a box or something, but give me a proper hug! Side-hugs for short people should be considered a form of discrimination.

I’ve seen friends grapple with heartache. When they came to me for advice, I mostly ended my advice with, “Pray about it. Rely on God.”

This past week, as I grappled with a personal heartache of mine, I realised that I didn’t actually understand what it meant to rely on God.

The phrase is kind of weird and ambiguous, if you think about it… “Rely on God.” What, did it mean that I’m supposed to physically lean on him? I know that he is everywhere, but physically leaning on him would probably end with me on the ground very bruised and very embarrassed. (Okay. Bad joke. But you get the idea.)

I thought that it just meant that you believed God would take away the pain. That’s not untrue, per se, but I realised this week that it’s a lot more than that.

Relying on God doesn’t mean that God will totally shield you from any heartache and pain. All of the people in the Bible suffered some pain and heartache in their time: Joseph with his brothers’ betrayal; David with the guilt of his adultery; Naomi with the loss of her husband and sons; Hosea with his wife’s infidelity… Like I said, my friends (who are mostly Christians) have grappled with heartache, I have grappled with heartache…

Relying on God means that you stand firm on him as your foundation. It doesn’t mean that you can’t cry out to God, or wonder why you are going through it. It means that you don’t walk away. It means you believe that he is still there even if you can’t feel him. It means you believe that no matter what the outcome, no matter how much pain you have to go through, he is still sovereign and he has control over your life. It means believing that he is enough, no matter what is taken away.

God is glorified in you when you are most satisfied in him in the midst of loss, not prosperity.
John Piper

It’s cold and wet outside, but it’s warm in here. I have my heater, I have my sweater, I have my blankets, I have my music, I have my Bible, I have God. I don’t think I’ve felt so content in a very long time.

I can feel God right now. I think I can feel him watching me. It’s the oddest sensation in the world. I know that there’s a lot in my life that I need to sort out - he’s convicted me of a lot this past week - but his love is constant. Despite the people I need to forgive, the habits I need to overcome, he’s there.

Like he always has been. Like he always will be.

for i am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
Romans 8:38-39

whom have i in heaven but You? and earth has nothing i desire besides You. my flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
Psalm 73:25-26

Vere Sanctus es, Domine
Fons omnis sanctitatis, Domine.

_{Truly you are holy, Lord,
the Font of all holiness, Lord.}

Jesus
salvation
grace
family
friends
SOAR
food
music
books
proxys
Facebook
holidays
rain
indoor plumbing
cameras
literacy
aeroplanes
Christmas
NaNoWriMo
iTunes
soundtracks
hope
sunshine
joy
laughter
jokes
awkwardness
clocks
beds
faith
sushi
kimbob
Dairy Queen
Dropbox
prayer
love
blessings

The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.”
1 Kings 19:7

It might sound odd, but this rather obscure verse hit me the other night as I was reading it. A little background to the verse: Elijah has just defeated the priests of Baal on Mount Carmel and is now fleeing Jezebel’s wrath. He lies under a tree in the desert and waits to die. However, God sends an angel and provides food and water for Elijah.

What I loved most about this verse is that the angel was sent twice. I especially love the words “for the journey is too much for you”. Some people seem to think that God is uncaring, that God makes us do all this work for him but doesn’t really understand. But God does understand - he understands that we’re finite humans, he understands that we will get discouraged, he understands that we will despair. But when the “journey is too much for” us, he will encourage us and provide for us so that we can stand up again.